He's even gotten motivated enough and more confident that he asked to have his dialysis changed from the Monday, Wednesday and Friday schedule so that he can go to the Senior Center and participate in some of their classes i.e., Tai Chi, yoga, etc. He's also gotten on the computer at both the Center and the daycare center and doing some research about a program he saw on TV last week. He's been sleeping somewhat better at night since he's not being allowed to take naps. All these things have been a wonderful thing.
Yesterday was one of those wonderful days. I dropped Joe off at the adult daycare and he was going over to the senior center around lunchtime. I picked him up at the regular time for his physical therapy, took him and they worked him hard. Although he still has some small back spasms and soreness, he did well. After the class was over, I took him by and purchased him a Subway combo since I was going to a baby shower.
About 9:30 p.m. I went into the kitchen to test Joe's blood sugar for the final time last night. It was at this time when he started complaining about the locator bracelet on his wrist and talking about how he hated it. I ignored him since I'd heard this before. Then I asked him to put away his tape recorder and put the earphones in their plastic bag. He got irrate about this when I hadn't responded to the comment about the bracelet.
Joe: I'm going to take you to court to have it removed, you b---ch!
Me: Go ahead and I'll be glad to submit a list of people who say you need it.
Joe: Yep, people you've influenced and told them bad things about me. (Another b---ch thrown in there somewhere).
Me: Right Joe. You act so stupid sometimes. The bracelet is going to stay.
Joe: (More argument. More b--ch).
Somewhere in all of this I have stroked his beard and told him to just get over it and then went to sit down on the couch to continue watching the television. That's when he snaps! He comes over to the couch, pushes me over and then takes his fingers or fist or something and presses it into my lower right scalp behind my ear. It hurts! He's scaring me this time because it's so forceful and he's so mad. I tell him to get up off me as I'm trying to push him back and he finally moves. He goes to the bedroom and tells me that
Joe: Marilyn will be by to visit me tomorrow while in dialysis. (Marilyn is the social worker talked about in http://gritsinwyoming.blogspot.com/2012/01/he-snapped.html).
Me: Go ahead and talk with her. But if you do that, you won't be here tomorrow night. Do you wanna start all that all over again?
Joe: No comment.
Me: I might as well go ahead and be washing up your clothes to take with you (as I'm taking the small suitcase out of our closet).
Nothing more is basically said other than I finally convinced him to let me cut the bracelet off his wrist and he does.
I go to bed at 11:15 ish sleeping on the queen-sized camping mattress in the living room. 1:00 ish I'm woke up by Joe making noise going to and from the bathroom.
2:50 a.m. Woke up again listening to the sound of the blowdryer and full light coming out of the bathroom. I get up to check it out. It's Joe, who has just recently finished a shower, drying himself off with the blowdryer with the door open and no regard to light nor sound.
Me: What are you doing? What are you doing at this time of the morning?
Joe: What time is it?
Me: It's not even 3:00 a.m. It's 2:50 a.m.
Joe: I'm sorry. I thought it was 7:30 a.m.
Me: This is exactly what I'm talking about when I say you are acting stupid! If it was 7:30 a.m., don't you think I would be up? That I would have woken you up before now? Can't you tell it's still pitch black outside? 7:30 would have light! Get back into bed! I need sleep!!!
Joe: I'm sorry.
He then goes to the bedroom, shuts the door and I use the bathroom. I go to check on him and find that he's fallen on the floor when he tried to climb into bed. I help him in and cover him up and go back to my bed. Thank goodness he stays there until I wake him up at the correct time.
On the way to the daycare, I ask him if I need to call anyone i.e., Marilyn so I can give her my side of the story after he's spoken with her, or the DFS lady or the cops? He assures me that he's not going to talk to her. Only time will tell. My head hurts where he pinned my head down. I have a headache and a real heartache. What's going on? What's going to happen? I tell him that if this ever happens again, I WILL call the cops.
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What am I going to do? I have worked with abused women and I am giving excuses for Joe just like those women do.
- I pushed him too far. But, I don't think I sparked that last night.
- Maybe he's got fluid coming back on his brain. (Called the doctor's office to move up his appointment. No can do).
- He's just way frustrated.
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